The Ugly Truth About Being Beautiful In The 21st Century
1st August 2018
#beauty
The Ugly Truth About Being Beautiful In The 21st Century.....
What does beauty look like?
There is a saying that beauty is in the eye of the beholder and to a certain degree I would agree that this is true, but unfortunately, beauty is largely determined by society and quite frankly some people have a warped idea of what beauty actually is! With social media exploding over the last 10 years we have entered an era where there is more pressure than ever to look beautiful. We are facing a beauty epidemic! Beauty to me is more than just aesthetics, it is kindness, creativity, humour, love and compassion. What makes someone truly beautiful is whats on the inside. Beauty is skin deep.
What does society tell us beauty looks like?
Society largely leads us to believe that beauty is how you look. I think for women the pressure from society to look and feel beautiful is really real. Unfortunately, even in the 21st Century, we are still experiencing judgement and discrimination for the way we present ourselves. In the fashion industry, there has always been pressure on models to be thin, on Instagram, the girls with the most 'likes' appear to have the best bodies, the long hair, the big lips, the most fashionable clothes... In the glossy mags much like the fashion industry, the girls all look the same. Celebrities are at the forefront leading the way, endorsed by aesthetic, fashion, supplement and beauty brands. On top of that, we live in the generation of super accessible porn. Which is giving men and even young boys a totally unrealistic idea of how women should look... So where does that leave us?! It pretty much leaves us feeling pressured into thinking that we should look a certain way and If we don't it means we criticise ourselves and feel insecure. In some cases, we may even experience discrimination for the way we look if it doesn't fit with the 'norm'.
Does social media play a part in determining how we think we should look?
Absolutely. In the late 1990's we had our first glimpse of social media networks and personally, I feel so grateful that mobile phones and social media came about as I left school, not before. It was hard enough growing up at an all-girls school let alone having to deal with the pressure of social media. Fast forward to 2018 we have the whole world at our fingertips. We can see what everyone else 'likes', what's trending and what all the women around the world 'look' like. We can also see all the trolling, negative press and shaming that goes on surrounding looks and body image. If you look at 13/14-year-olds now vs over 15 years ago when I was that age, they are more glamorous, more made up and more mature looking than ever.
As a Professional Make Up Artist I have seen a huge shift in the way women think and feel about the way they look. The media is constantly pushing an image of beauty on us that is all about the aesthetics and it can leave our confidence at rock bottom. The average women will spend hours a week scrolling through Instagram and Facebook comparing how they look to other women. We are seeing more and more women opt to post filtered photos over natural ones and It almost acts as a benchmark to what we should actually look like. The problem is a lot of the 'beautiful people' are fake, it's all edited, filtered and pretty superficial in my opinion. The really sad fact is beauty sells, particularly In the make up industry, for example, the pictures that get the most likes on Instagram are always the pictures of the prettiest girls that are heavily edited. These days young girls are aspiring to a very generic look that is in some cases largely artificial and this is a worry for the future with social media getting more and more popular.
My first-hand experience of discrimination for the way i look
In some cases striving for the modern age version of beauty can actually be damaging to our mental health. Most women will have struggled with anxieties and insecurities surrounding the way they look and I am no different. Working within the make up industry exposes you to the ugliest side of beauty. Something I will always remember is when I broke out with chronic adult acne. I will never forget how much it affected my confidence, but also how I felt people viewed me. On one particular occasion, I went for an interview with a well known cosmetic brand. During the interview process, one of the first things they did was to take my picture. Now, this could have just been to remember who each individual candidate was, but I had never experienced that kind of procedure before (nor have I since by the way). I felt very intimidated and exposed. I was well qualified for the job and I interviewed well. I didn't get the job and it did leave me questioning was it my skin that had 'let me down'?.... Having adult acne made me realise how much I liked my appearance before my break out and how the way I looked was what made me feel beautiful. This was about 7 years ago and I now feel like I have a greater understanding of true beauty is. However, because of the world we live in that's not to say that if my skin broke out badly again that It would not affect me in the same way. Young women today are growing up in the most pressured society to date and I feel for every woman that has self confidence issues.
AT WHAT COST DOES MODERN DAY BEAUTY COME?
I worry about the future of our children growing up in a completely fabricated reality of what women should aspire to be. I am all for making the most of your appearance, but unfortunately, women (and more worrying young girls) are completely moving away from enhancing their natural beauty and opting for aesthetic treatments to totally transform their image. The worry with this is that they will take it too far. The other worry is, of course, the age in which girls are having these treatments. I've seen girls as young as 19 having botox and boob jobs. I chose at the age of 32 to have a small amount of botox in my forehead so I appreciate I may seem like a hypocrite, but I want to reiterate I am not against enhancing your beauty or aesthetics but I guess for me personally it's the reasons behind the treatment that concerns me and the effects of social media on the choices young women are making. I too actually had a breast enlargement at 19, but this was a time before the pressures of social media and I can honestly say that I did it for me and no one else.
my views on Plastic Surgery to enhance the way you look
Lots of women, including me, opt for plastic surgery to' improve' their appearance. For me, plastic surgery has enhanced areas of my body that previously made me unhappy and I want to point out I was not unhappy because of how I felt other people viewed me. It was always lead by a desire to feel more comfortable in my own skin, regardless of what other people thought. The advances in the plastic surgery and aesthetic treatments over the years have been immense and there is definitely a place for it. Cosmetic procedures help so many people overcome insecurities and things that hold them back. The downside is not everyone can afford it and there are a lot of unreputable companies out there. Botched surgeries are being done every day and companies are praying on the insecurities of women to sell them their services. The other downside is that they are becoming so popular and easily available that it is becoming the norm to have treatments like these. In some circumstances, there isn't as much consideration going into these procedures and by who people are getting them. Lip fillers are a great example of something that is easily accessible and easily overdone! When looking into plastic surgery it should never be about how other people view you. Consider all the positives and negatives. Think about how it may impact your life for the better, or worse and always do your research on who and where you are getting it done. If something is going to improve your life and the risks have been well calculated and considered then go for it.
So How should beauty look?
I think the important thing to remember is that it's not really wanting to look and feel good that is the problem. The main problem is when we compare ourselves to other people and seeing beauty based on what society would lead us to believe it is. The way I see it is you should never change how you look or feel based on someone else's version of what beauty should look like. Furthermore, beauty isn't always external, you can be the most attractive person in the world aesthetically but if you have unattractive qualities and personality traits then that will change the way people perceive you. Beauty for me has no boundaries. We are all beautiful. Our size, what we wear, our style, our aesthetics, all these things are relatively superficial it's what comes from inside. As I mentioned at the beginning of this blog I believe it can be how kind, compassionate, loving, creative, inspiring and funny you are.
If you are reading this then I want you to know you are beautiful, In your own way and for your own individual reasons.
Own your beauty and if you don't already, learn to love yourself.
Suezanna xoxo